Chapter 13 - Why Mara Did Not Go to Court
This became the question people used against her.
If she wanted Corvin to know, why not file a paternity case?
Fair.
Painful.
Mara had reasons.
Not all good.
First year:
She genuinely feared the Ashford family.
The old reputation.
My father’s history.
Security teams.
Money.
Lucasta repeatedly told her:
“If you litigate, Corvin’s counsel will treat it as an adversarial custody claim.”
Not necessarily false.
Lawyers would respond.
Mara imagined the worst.
Second year:
Tamsin was small.
Mara’s architectural work stabilized.
She told herself letters might eventually reach me.
Third year:
She consulted a family-law attorney in Maine.
He told her:
“You can establish paternity without surrendering custody.”
Good advice.
She did not file.
Why?
“Because if the court proved he was her father and he still didn’t want her, I couldn’t tell myself the letters were lost.”
There.
Hope protected through ambiguity.
Fourth year:
She tried again through certified correspondence.
Lucasta answered:
Corvin’s position has not changed. He will not intrude on the stable life you requested.
That sounded almost respectful.
Mara read it as rejection.
Fifth year:
Tamsin began asking.
Mara considered court again.
Then her aunt Margaret became ill.
Work.
Life.
Delay.
Sixth year:
Her therapist asked:
“What are you protecting Tamsin from now—the Ashfords or an answer?”
That broke something.
Mara hired Caroline Beck.
Within weeks, documents reached Martin Gray.
The gala meeting was arranged.
Mara said in therapy with me later:
“I was not imprisoned by Lucasta.”
“No.”
“I need you to know that.”
“I do.”
“I made choices.”
“Yes.”
“I regret some.”
“Yes.”
Then:
“Do not use that to make what she did smaller.”
“I won’t.”
Agency and victimization can coexist.
People hate that because it complicates blame.
May you like
Reality survives complexity.
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