Chapter 5 - My mother-in-law? No, my own mother
Lauren’s mother, Patricia, lived forty minutes away.
Eli adored her.
After Lauren died, Patricia became the person who could mention Lauren without making the room collapse.
Simone initially encouraged that relationship.
Then calls became less frequent.
I thought:
Teenage independence arriving early.
Eli was twelve.
Maybe.
Patricia told child services something else.
“When Marcus travels, Simone sometimes says Eli is grounded and can’t visit.”
How often?
Five times in four months.
“Did she say why?”
Disrespect.
Missing chores.
Bad attitude.
Reasonable categories.
Maybe not reasonable severity.
Patricia called me once.
I remembered.
“Why can’t I see Eli tomorrow?”
I answered:
“Simone says he’s grounded.”
Patricia said:
“From grandparents?”
I laughed.
“Apparently.”
Then I changed subject.
That memory became one more place where I had accepted Simone’s authority without asking what the authority actually meant.
I had never agreed:
Grounding includes cutting off maternal grandparents.
I simply did not challenge it.
Convenient parenting is still parenting.
Delegation without questions can become abandonment by inches.
Not legal abandonment.
Emotional absence.
May you like
That belonged to me.
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